I was convinced that I had finally got over Adam. I didn't hope that every time someone texted me, it was him. I had stopped wanting to text him and stalk him on Facebook and I was finding it easier to do the basic things I did on a daily basis, such as reading.
But there are times when I have a sudden and desperate need for him. I just want him to be here next to me and I want him to hold me and just talk about anything and everything. At these times I get easily irritable and start to feel upset and down. I then think about his other relationships and remember that by now he is probably officially going out with Jemma and has probably already slept with her.
There is no going back.
I wish I could get him out of my life completely so that I wouldn't have to make such a big physical and emotional effort to try and forget him.
I'm finding it really hard to just focus on my work, which is really important right now because I fell so behind over the past few months and I have exams coming up in January. I need to reassess my priorities. Figure out what is important right now and what isn't and then aim whatever energy I can muster towards my goal.
I just get so so scared at times about the future and what it has to offer me. I need something better to be able to make it beyond this situation and to get over all the hurt that I have felt. I don't want to carry 'relationship baggage' around with me.
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