I think I walked in on my parents' having sex

The title says it all really! This doesn't even need a blog post to go with it.

Me and my dad had planned a trip today to an event which, we thought, was taking place somewhere in East London. I needed some specific ID to gain entry and we decided that he would work out how to get there, while I could search for my ID.

But then the entire family decided to watch a film.

By the time we finished watching, it was too late to research the route (apparently) so everyone headed to bed. My parents retired to their room while I decided to just surf the internet for while. Then I thought I would spare my dad some trouble and research the route myself. I checked the event details and it was actually in Coventry. Which is a 2 or 3 hour drive from our house. I was definitely not up for that!

I thought it would be best if I told my dad now (even though it was likely he would be asleep) as I didn't want him to wake me up to tell me tomorrow morning.

So I walked into my parents room without knocking.

"Oy!" My dad exclaimed.

I couldn't see anything as it was completely dark. I fumbled with the light switch and turned it on. My parents were lying extremely close together and my dad's top was in an awkward position. I was so embarrassed, but I acted as though I hadn't noticed anything different.

I quickly told him that the event was in Coventry so we couldn't go and left.

I cannot believe this actually happened. I am ashamed and slightly grossed out. A friendly warning to all: always knock before entering.

"I'm sorry I've been a 'bad boyfriend'"

I have decided that I really need to start switching my phone off when I go to bed.

Last night I went to bed just after midnight as I wanted to wake up early today to pack (I return to university accommodation tomorrow). But a good night's sleep was not on the cards as I was woken up at 3am by my phone going off.

Jerked awake from my sleep, I first thought it was my alarm (set for 7.30am) and reached out to my phone to switch it off. Forcing my eyes open, I saw that it was not actually my alarm and the time was 3.03am. The number was not in my contacts, but I recognised it straight away. It was Adam.

I panicked and frantically debated whether I should pick up or ignore the call. I picked up.

"Hello?"

As soon as I said hello, he cut the call.

I was relieved. I have no idea what I would have said to him.

I put the phone back on my bedside table and tried to go to sleep.

A few minutes later it rang again. This time I didn't even want to pick up, but as soon I looked at who was calling, the call was cut off. I thought he was just trying to irritate me and annoy me - or perhaps it was one of his friends. I expected that he would just leave a voicemail if he really wanted to talk.

I turned my phone to silent and closed my eyes. But the damage had been done. My heart was racing and the adrenaline wouldn't let me sleep. I checked my phone again and there was no message or text - strange I thought.

Eventually I must have fallen asleep because when I next opened my eyes, it was 7am.

I checked my phone - there was a text. I knew it would be from him and it was.

"Hey. It's Adam (Bankson) on +[his number]. Basically, and there's no easy way of saying this, but, I still have the same feelings I did for you all that long time ago. Quite badly infact. I know I was a bad boyfriend and I know we cannot be together now because of me but I think about you and I still love you so so much. I'm so sorry for what happened because I realise now - way too late - that you're the perfect girl. I hope you're happy if you're in a new relationship - and I'm still thinking of you baby - no-one can replace you. From Adam. X"

It was the usual crap, but somehow it didn't affect me as much as it would have done before. As I type it up, I can feel it more than I did when I read it. It was just so predictable. And I was actually able to laugh at the way he had apologised. He had been a "bad boyfriend"! He made it seem so minor. As if his idea of cheating is just a little mistake. It;'s as if a little kid was being told off for being caught with his hand in the cookie jar or something.

I realised so many things once I had thought about it properly:

1. He contacted me at 3am on Friday night. I think he was probably drunk anyway as he spends 90percent of the nights drunk. So it invalidates any remorse he had – it was the alcohol speaking.
2. IF he is feeling remorse it is only out of desperation and not because he actually wants me. I think he’s just run out of girls who will give him a chance now. So he thinks it’s time to get back to what he had with me – I put up with so much of his crap!
3. He says “bad boyfriend” as if it was a minor thing! He cheated. I gave him another chance. He did it again. I told him to prove his love. He didn’t bother – he just went off with other girls.
4. If I was really in a new relationship would my new bf be happy about my ex texting me such things!? He’s selfish and inconsiderate.

Then came the anger. How dare he call me "baby"? He doesn't have the right to call me that anymore. I'm going to be someone else's baby. And if he really thought I was in a new relationship, did he think my boyfriend would be okay with my ex sending me such texts? He was being him as usual - selfish.

I'm trying to get over him and every few months he does something like this to make sure I don't move on. If he was really remorseful, surely he would at least have had the decency to apologise in person? But he's probably just running out of girls who will give him a chance and wants to get back to where he felt 'safe'.

Well I have finally learnt to pity him rather than actually take his words seriously. As he said himself, it is way too late.

So I called back

I mentioned that I got a call from a number I didn't recognise. When I called back straight away it had gone to voicemail, but I decided that I needed to make sure it wasn't someone who was trying to get in touch with me and expecting a call back.

So I called again tonight, except this time I turned my phone to hide my number - it would show up as "private number" and wouldn't say who was calling.

It rang.

And then someone picked up. Someone male.

I have no idea who it was, and I wouldn't dare to hazard that it was Adam. I don't remember exactly what Adam sounds like on the phone anymore since it has been over 4 months since we've spoken on the phone.

"Hello, who is this?" I asked.

"God. You sound so hot. Why don't you come over?"

"I'm sorry, I got a missed call from this number."

"Wow. Are you sure you're not extremely sexy? You should just come over."

"I..I think I have the wrong number."

"Aww you think you have the wrong number. Darling.."

And I cut the call.

I was shaking so much. Completely. I panicked and texted my friend Claire to ask her to call them up. She said she was in bed and would text instead.

So she sent a text: "Hey, who's this? My mate got a missed called from this number and we didn't recognise it"

They tried calling her back, but she didn't pick up and then got a text saying "whose this?"

She said she kept getting phone call after phone call (a classic Adam trait) but she didn't pick up.

I now have absolutely no idea who it could have been or what they wanted. Sure, it could have been a joke, but I am really really possessive of my phone number and don't give it out easily. So it must be someone in my close friends, but I know none of them would play a prank like this.

I've never ever had a prank phone call in my entire life. 

This would be the first. And I really hope this would be the last.

Every time I don't recognise the number

So I just got a call from a number I didn't recognise and I missed it. When I called back, it went straight to voice-mail.

Every time this happens I freak out, thinking that it is Adam calling. There are not many people who have my number (something I tend to be quite guarded about), but there are even fewer people who have my number and whose number I don't have. So, it is quite a novelty to get a phonecall from a number I don't have.

I will probably try calling again tomorrow. Or maybe I should wait until they call again? If it's someone who really wants to get in touch, then they'll just call back?

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!

New blog!

I have realised that over the course of the past few months, while writing about my life and how I was recovering and building myself up again, I have also learnt a lot about relationships. These lessons are not just mine. They have originated through other people's struggles and, often, things I have heard about.

So, I am going to focus my personal story on this blog (now called amyslovestory.blogspot.com) and write about the relationship and life lessons I've learnt on a separate blog (becauseIgotlifetodo.blogspot.com).