We decided that it had to be a upper-class venue and decided to go for either Mayfair or Chelsea, eventually going for Upper West (Abel) in Chelsea. I would NEVER recommend this club to anyone. The drinks were too expensive, the venue was sub-standard and we were made to pay even though we were on the guest-list. Unlike some of the other clubs, the bouncers and entry staff were rude and everyone seemed to be 30/35 or older. I went with three other girls and we all felt out of place. It seemed unnaturally 'mature' even though the club itself was good.
I danced, but the music was quite crappy and I kept thinking about how if I had called up Adam, he would have come to pick me up and we would have spent the night together afterwards. I missed him even when I was supposed to be having fun.
There were no guys our age and there were certainly not any that I was interested in, but I felt guilty leaving Clara behind, who had wanted to go out for ages.
We hung around until around 2am and eventually decided that we couldn't take any more and told Clara we were leaving. She was too busy with a guy to notice and we left.
I got back late and saw that Mack had texted me.
15/3/2013 15:46: Mack: Alright, sounds good. Enjoy Mayfair and if
you find it boring txt me. I'll be dancing until three at Kingsway.
15/3/2013 16:03: Amy:
Thanks! Woahh have fun dancing the night away :)
15/3/2013 16:11:
Mack: I always do, I can count on not being bored when I go dance ;)
I was bored. Plus I wanted some attention from him. So I texted him back that I had just finished and was heading back now. He said that he was also out at a Salsa/Tango party and he would be up for meeting up if I wanted at 3am.
15/3/2013 23:26: Amy: How's salsa?
15/3/2013 23:27: Amy: Party hasn't started yet here.
16/3/2013 01:39: Mack: It's fucking awesome! And it's tango :p sorry u have had my phone in me all night. Hows ur night?
16/3/2013 01:41: Mack: It us ending in 1hr though so if you want to Do something let me know!
16/3/2013 01:44: Mack: Jesus spell check is wrong. I haven't had my phone on me. And it is ending...
16/3/2013 02:15: Amy: I just finished!
16/3/2013 02:15: Amy: It got better in the end
16/3/2013 02:15: Amy: How was yours?
16/3/2013 02:18: Mack: Its barely going. People are getting tired but I'm up. What r u doing?
16/3/2013 02:20: Amy: Just getting my stuff from the cloakroom now
16/3/2013 02:24: Mack: Want to run around for a bit
16/3/2013 02:25: Amy: What?
16/3/2013 02:25: Amy: Where?
16/3/2013 02:28: Mack: Idk London. Idk whats open but we can try to find alcohol for myself at least.
16/3/2013 02:28: Amy: Oh god
16/3/2013 02:28: Amy: You want to get even more drunk?!
16/3/2013 02:29: Mack: Im not drunk. Can't be to dance. That's the problem :(
16/3/2013 02:29: Amy: Where are you now?
16/3/2013 02:29: Amy: Oh.
16/3/2013 02:29: Mack: Kingsway, by Belgo just north of lse. Come see the end of the milonga!!
16/3/2013 02:30: Mack: Seriously, it will make you rethink why you go out at night.
16/3/2013 02:30: Amy: Really?
16/3/2013 02:30: Amy: I won't be there for a while
16/3/2013 02:31: Amy: I'm just getting out now
16/3/2013 02:32: Mack: U have 30 minutes to see me dance. I'll wait after to go do something so don't worry about missing me.
16/3/2013 02:32: Mack: Milonga ends at three.
16/3/2013 02:33: Amy: Okay
16/3/2013 02:33: Amy: I'll get off at holborn
16/3/2013 02:33: Amy: And msg you when I'm off
16/3/2013 02:33: Amy: Btw phone has low battery
16/3/2013 02:33: Amy: If you don't hear from me by 3
16/3/2013 02:33: Amy: Just leave
16/3/2013 02:34: Mack: Ok sounds good.
I thought about what I was doing. I barely knew him and he was much bigger than me. It was a ridiculous time to be meeting up with a stranger. Only me and Adam had ever met up at such a time. But I said yes. I said I would head back and meet him close to his dance place.
I reached at 3am and started walking towards the party. He was leaving and we met each other half-way. He said I looked gorgeous and I blushed. He was taller than I remembered. I was used to being taller than Adam in heels, but Mack was much taller. He held me close and I felt safe. Weirdly, I felt like I could rely on him.
We started walking and he asked where I wanted to go. I said I was freezing so he could walk me back.
I had dressed for a club and was wearing no tights, just a dress and heels. It was 0 degrees Celsius outside. Mack noticed that I was freezing and told me to hold his beer. He took off his scarf and wrapped it around me.
"That's better, right?"
"Haha really. I don't need it!"
"Yes, you do. You look frozen!"
I thanked him and we kept walking. I was thinking about how Adam would always insist I take his coat whenever I was cold. I would never accept it, and he would kept pressurising me. He never just took it off and gave it to me until I said "yes" though.
We walked back and talked about his University in the States and how he liked London. He was definitely better looking than Adam, but I wasn't physically attracted to him. And I really didn't want him to kiss me or make a move.
We reached my Halls of Residence and he stopped outside and asked that I should think about what I wanted to do the following night (Saturday).
"Dinner, maybe?"
"I'll let you know." I smiled.
"Okay sure."
He left, just giving me a hug and kissing me on the cheek.
I walked into my room in a daze. It was weird. He seemed so perfect, but I didn't even want to give him a shot at a relationship with me. I just wasn't ready. I kept wanting to move on, but it just felt so wrong and I felt guilty about using Mack as a rebound, he seemed genuinely interested.
I think I should give him one chance. After all, I only started liking Adam as more than a friend after spending hours and hours with him and only when I found out that he really liked me.
Was it just a way of validating my interest? He liked me, so I had to like him back? I guess the subconscious part of me wanted it that way because suddenly I wanted something more with him than I had. Maybe Mack deserved that chance too?
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